"I felt like running..."
The truth is as a woman of my family we all have the tendency to be bottom heavy so I have always tried to keep an eye on my weight, and that I did. I watched it go up and down and up and down. At my heaviest I was 160lbs on a 5'2" frame, which was not good. Prior to getting married I got down to 120lbs in the course of one year. The weight returned faster then I anticipated. I quickly jumped back up to 14olb before I knew it, guess I went on a binge and ate all the stuff I couldn't have before the wedding :o) I gained weight so fast people started to think I was preggers! YIKES! I started to work on the weight again and got back down to 120 which took me about 9 months. Then it started to creep back up! It would have kept going up if Brad did not make the decision to go to Mexico this year.
With the impending date of heading to Mexico and having to wiggle myself into a two piece made my stomach twist. So, I decided that I would start to work on my weight again. I started to take part in a walking group at work. I would walk 1 1/2 miles at lunch and focus on what I am eating. Finding foods that I like are are good for me has been hard and I get off track often.
Wiggling in to that two piece still made me want to up chuck my last meal but I was a trooper and did it. I felt better after I bought a wrap to cover up. I mean have you "seen" the scenery in Mexico? I felt like the kid no one wanted on their soccer team and had to be the "second goalie"
So after I returned from Mexico, and realising that there would never be a day that I would look like I used to at the current rate, I decided that walking was not enough, so I decided to start running.
So to bring you to the current date and time, I have noticed physical changes in me I also noticed mental changes. For one I bought a scale which was a huge step. Brad once tried to bring on in to the house about two years ago and I tossed that before it even hit the bathroom floor. I never wanted to obsess about my weight ever again. The focus is to feel healthy and feel comfortable in my own skin. For me to step on that little white scale by choice and not for the annual doctor's visit is scary thought.
There are times that I ask myself what have a gotten myself into? and wonder if I am going to finish it. I would only be out $25 bucks but the shame I would face by not finishing something I started kicks my butt back on the wagon. There are times when I back off running and I think that I need the mental rest, but when I get back I feel great and what makes it better is I do a run better then the last time!
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